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2021 Mother’s Day Feature
2020/2021 has been whirlwind. So this year we wanted to highlight some real inspirational women of the pandemic, the mothers. We can only imagine how much the mothers have gone through during the past year raising children alongside work, a social life and just staying safe. We interviewed 3 amazing women, Rhea Ellen, Delicia London and Ashleigh Stunna who’ve given us some insight into their world right now, how they’re handled everything and life as a mother in 5 questions.
Q1. What’s been the challenges of being a parent during these times?
Rhea: I think mainly being able to take my son to playgroups & to watch him interact with other children. I say that but my son has no clue & is satisfied with some sticks & leaves in the park.
Delicia: For me, the hardest thing about being a parent during these times has been how isolated you can feel at times, not only for yourself, but also for your child. It’s really sad to know my daughter hasn’t really been able to enjoy the first year of her life the way she would have if we weren’t in a pandemic. For example, we couldn’t throw her a birthday party and could only spend it alone with her dad and facetime everyone else. As much as i’m thankful for our good health, I still do really want my child to experience what other kids got the chance to. She’s never been on a playdate or had the chance to go to soft play. Hasn’t been to the zoo or farm. And yes we’ll have plenty of time for that in the years to come, but sometimes I do get worried it may have an impact on her development. She hardly gets to see anyone, and when she does they’re all wearing a mask. I haven’t seen any of my friends or had the chance to make any mum friends. These are the kinds of things you get to look forward to when you’re pregnant. I just feel like i’ve really missed out on a lot. After you’ve had a child, I think naturally you feel lonely. Can you imagine how lonely it feels when you add a global pandemic and lockdown to the equation.
Ashleigh: The biggest challenge has been lockdown especially as this is my first child, having to adjust and my son thinking the normal day 2 day is just living at home and seeing only myself and his dad most of the time, hasn’t kind of made him reluctant to go to anyone else. He’s just turnt one years old and he’s a total lockdown baby, he doesn’t really get the chance to interact with other babies or go to playgroups so it is a bit of a weird one but hopefully things will pick up so his social development can start and he can know life as I once knew it.
Q2. Being a mother, we are sure teaches you a lot about yourself as a woman. What’s the biggest lesson you’ve learnt about yourself?
Rhea: This is a good question , I had to think hard about this. I’ve learnt so much but the main thing I’ve learnt is how strong I am & how everyday truly is a fresh day & I have to be thankful for that.
Delicia: I learnt how strong and independent I am. I realised there wasn’t much that could break me and that situations I was placed in were never to cause me harm, but to teach me a lesson and make me stronger. I learnt how powerful my mind is and that i could have anything i wanted just as long as I put my mind to it. For example i feel like my birthing experience was pretty okay because of how i mentally prepared myself. I also manifested the day my daughter was born because i really wanted her to be a libra lol. When she actually came on that day, thats when I knew i was powerful and that my mind was capable of anything.
Ashleigh: The biggest lesson I’ve learnt is now that I’m a mother it’s not just about me anymore, but in everything I do is to put my son first, it’s taught be to be ever so selfless and also very protective and aware of everything as he grows, from the things he’s surrounded with, watches and even eats as he’s maturing into the next stages.
Q3. As a mother to a black child have you already started to think about certain conversations you’ll need to have with your child as they get older?
Rhea: Yes, me and my partner always discuss this, for example having to work 10x harder than a white child & understanding that there are stereotypes around us because we are black.
Delicia: To an extent. I’m mainly focused on letting my daughter know she can have and do whatever she wants in life, just as long as she works hard for it and believes its something she can have too. I rather not let her think she can’t have or achieve something because of the colour of her skin because that’s when that will manifest into her reality. There are certain things that aren’t really in our control that i’m going to make her aware of beforehand, but to be honest, i haven’t really given it much thought just yet. I just want her to know she’s amazing and can do anything and being black won’t be an issue. I’m very focused on letting her know we come from greatness, no matter what the history books say. I’m very big on breaking generational curses so as much as im going to let her know about certain things, i’m more focused on putting emphasis on the positive things so that she doesn’t feel any limitation when it comes to her.
Ashleigh: I haven’t started to think of the conversations, but I have already bought loads of books that are written by black authors and represent black babies in them so he is familiar with “who he is” and being a black baby before he starts school. One book that he really loves is “King of Kindergarten” such a lovely book so it’s then it makes easier to have these conversations as he gets older and he will not be in fear because of his skin colour.
Q4. What’s the most beautiful part of motherhood?
Rhea: Wow there’s so many things but mainly watching my son grow, reaching milestones , experiencing his happiness from the smallest things like sand.
Delicia: I have a best friend. She’s only 1 but our bond is stronger than any bond i’ve ever had with anyone. Getting to love someone unconditionally is a beautiful feeling, and knowing they love you the same right back feels even better.
Ashleigh: For me it’s watching him grow and surpass every milestone and witnessing how intelligent he is as he copies you and then does it all by himself. It’s the grin on my sons face when he’s gets something right and we clap for him. Melts my heart every-time!
Q5. What lessons have you learned from your own mother that you’ll want to or already have passed down to your child?
Rhea: Yes!, mainly to be proud of being black, tall and strong. To always use your voice and your words & to be glad that you’re intriguing it keeps people interested.
Delicia: My mums a very hard worker. Watching the way she works when she wants something is inspiring and she never gives up. I hope my daughter sees that in me and takes that on too.
Ashleigh: Well to always PRAY, my mother is a very prayerful woman and it’s something that I’m definitely going to instil with my son as I believe it has helped us through life to have faith in everything we want in life. She has also taught me to always be Patient with my child no matter how challenging it can get and to observe the developments of my child in order to notice anything that may be concerning from an early stage to be able to work on it and coach them through for their best potential. Thanks Mum xx
BLACK POUND DAY
Black Pound Day is a solution-based approach to support the growth of the UK Black economy. As a direct and peaceful response to the systematic racism that creates un-equality for the Black community in the United Kingdom.
In response to the death of George Floyd and the current Black Lives Matter protests, So Solid Crew’s, Swiss has developed the idea of Black Pound Day. His idea hopes to underpin our long-term financial growth and infrastructure, empowering and motivating the Black community.
Black Pound Day encourages everyone to replace their usual purchases with products from Black-owned businesses, once a month.
Spending locally or online with UK Black-owned businesses.
The day is also an opportunity to find out how everyone can support Black businesses over the long-term. So don’t forget to share brands that you love, businesses that you can’t live without and make sure to hashtag #BlackPoundDay.” – Blackpoundday.uk
VAMP UK ladies are our 2020 Brown Sugar Award Business Honourees this year. What they do by creating and managing black events and black people on a global scale is what makes them so special. These three ladies are women we should ALL be looking up to in terms of work ethic. We celebrate them.